Happy 50th Birthday Maribel Ortiz aka Mari

     Today, I celebrate 5 decades of life, or like someone told me, half a century. I am so blessed to have reach this age without any medical issues. I am blessed to be surrounded by wonderful friends and family that support me and love me deeply. I am grateful for my life experiences, for having my mom, my brothers, my grandma, cousins, aunts, uncles, and my boyfriend. I was raised by powerful women, and  I hope I have made you proud. I know you didn’t recognize your power, but you were, and you transferred that power to every cell of my being.

     As I look back I am pleased to have reached the goals I have set, and I feel I have been a good steward of the life God entrusted me with. As I enter the second half of my life I thought of my children including Kassi and their struggles and stressors,  and I decided to write some of the life lesions that I have learned in these 50 years, lessons that helped live a full and rich life. I wish someone would have reach out to me  when I was 20 or 30 and told me that things were going to be OK.

To my daughter’s (Stephanie, Hazel, Kiara and Kassi) and my son…you guys are my greatest gift! You made these 50 years’ worth living. If I have a grandchild that will help me on the next chapter (just saying).

    

            1) Life is a journey, and every step brings us a lesson. Do not live your life like you are finding a destination, as once you get there your goals might be different and you may feel disappointed.

            2)  Life is a dance, sometimes you lead and others you have to follow. Accept its rhythm and follow its flow, so it goes smoothly. The music are your goals as they set the tone for that long and beautiful dance.

  
     3)  Always be humble. Do not fight for recognition as it depends on other’s views. Just follow your heart and that will be your reward, knowing you did the right thing.

   

           4) Never forget the ones that helped you, the ones that uplift you, those ones that are sometimes behind the curtain. Pay it forward to others in their name and praise them because you were the chosen one to get the gift of their support. 

          5) Live with purpose. Everything that happens in your day should be purposeful, your comments, your interactions, your advice, your decisions…everything.  

     
   6)  Clean the slate before new relationships and do not allow your life stories to become baggage and damage your future experiences.  

   

            7) Go away…be alone and enjoy the gift of solitude.  

         

           8) Do not allow anyone to put obstacles in your path…ever!

     

           9)    Do not allow others to write your narrative. Your life story is yours and you should be the only author.   

          10)   Don’t expose your good deeds, do them in private as God will reward you. 

          11)   Look at your life like a book and not just like a chapter. Just like a book, you may not like every chapter but you may still like the story.

      

          12)   Never say no to a challenge as perhaps is a missed opportunity for a great life lesson.

       

          13)   Never get skewed by other’s opinions. Develop your own... always!

    

          14)   Listen more and talk less. 

  

          15)   Embrace your “flaws” like a chemical formula where all molecules are important.

      

         16)   Love yourself like no one, and make yourself a priority.  

          17)   Put yourself first, so you don’t try to live your life through others.  

    

          18)   Choose your battles. Not every battle is worth fighting and sometimes by “losing” your win more.

          

          19)   You will be judge unfairly; no everyone will like you…just let it go.

   

         20)   Honor your parents, and be a better parent than they were.

      

         21)   Teach others how to treat you.

    

        22)   Respect your body, as you only get one.

    

        23)   Do not make decisions based on guilt.

  

        24)   Be grateful everyday as you are one of the lucky ones that are alive to see it.

    

       25)   Set your intentions every morning.

    

      26)   Live by example and don’t expect from others what you don’t give.

   

      27)   Be with someone that allows you to be yourself.

  

     28)   No breakup will break you, but make sure you honor the past relationships as they brought something to your life. The ending of a relationship isn’t a failure; the failure comes from dismissing the lessons from it.

    

      29)   Stand by what you believe, even if you stand alone.

      30)   Lastly, live…just live like every day is the last one!

     I am looking forward to see what this decade brings me. My intentions have been set and my goals have been written. 

      Thank you for making my life a wonderful and fun journey. The best is yet to come.

My best friend

Everyone comes to our lives with a purpose, and sometimes that purpose isn't reveal instantly but later on.

In 2001 I met a woman, and I just didn't know what an important role she will play in my life. She was powerful, outgoing, vibrant, classy, witty and had a story for everything. There was nothing that you could say that she didn't have something to add. I was curious about her and she soon made me feel at ease and comfortable. I remember I was pregnant with my son AJ, and I was worried about the possibility that he will be born with Down Syndrome as the doctor suspected. She stopped what she was doing and heard me. She paid attention to my story and gave me so much comfort. After that conversation I was fearless. At that moment I fell in love with her and that love is bigger than ever.

I have never heard anyone saying a bad word about her. She has been through so much and her level of strength is remarkable. She is a hero without a cape. She is a lady, and her grace clears the path she walks on. Her personality is bigger than any room she's ever been in. Her smile is genuine and contagious. Her hugs warm your heart and quiet your soul. Her spirit is unwavering. She has been up, and she been down but like Maya Angelou described in one of her poems, "...but sill, like air. She will rise".  

When we worked together she was better than Google, she knew everything...from sports to medicine. Her brain is amazing. I think she memorized all the books she read, the PDR, The DSM V and the Merck Manual among others. She is impressive. It didn't help that she became a physician before she moved to Massachusetts.


She is a philanthropist, and not because she gives away money but something greater, she gives herself in such genuine way. She is one on those people that touches you without ever placing a hand on you. She creates movement by being still. She has taught me so much. She is my best friend, my counselor, my guide, my cheerleader, my confidant, my secret keeper, etc. I look up to her and her opinion I have in great regard. I hope that someday I can walk in her shadow, because her shoes are too big for me.

Today, I honor my best friend Magaly Mercedes Rodriguez. Our relationship is until death do us part. I love you so much! Since I met you, I have never felt alone. Thank you for the gifts that you have given me. Happy 71st birthday!

The journey of life

Several weeks ago I became aware that a friend has cancer and it seems terminal. It seemed unexpected, which seems to be the usual cancer style. Uninvited, by surprise...almost like a thief in the middle of the night trying to rob you of your most  precious possessions... your biggest treasures.


I thought of the plans made after the many years worked, and all the money saved. So many years of waiting and planning just shattered like a mirror that falls on a marble floor.  All those plans were severed by a cancer diagnosis.

I have been unable to stop thinking about this since the moment I was given the news. I started to question my own life journey. Am I living life to the fullest? Am I living life like I am going to a specific destination? Am I existing or living? Am I living like I am never dying or like if I will die tomorrow? So many thoughts still crossing my mind and I am filled with sorrow and the realization that life is so fragile, and like Paulo Coelho said - "sometimes it is impossible to stop the river of life". Life has a path, just like a river; we just don't know where or when will meet the ocean.


How insane it is that all our lives we fight to be in control and when we come to the end, we are so powerless. In our culture our jobs rule our world and at the end of the journey our job lowers to a lesser level of importance, and the people and the relationships we sacrificed by it seem to raise to the top. How different is our life perspective when we have less time to live. How valuable time itself feels when its almost gone.

We seem to live like we are going to a destination and at times we just exist and dream about that time in the far future. Most of our lives are spent packing for that "trip" or even trying to not make any stops because they will slow us down. I understand that our jobs are necessary and important, and so is our life.  Why it is so hard to find balance? I think is because we feel that our life will always be there and we take it for granted. We stop enjoying our surroundings, smelling the coffee and even savoring it. We stop noticing people around us because we are on the phone or on the Internet. We don't listen to our priest because we are busy checking for texts. We can't enjoy the moment because we are loaded with painful pasts, poorly managed stress, unnecessary emotional burden or because we are planning for the future. We always have a great excuse to not be present when we know that the present is all we have. 
 
Renew you compromise to yourself every morning. Be thankful and grateful. Laugh more, love more and above all, live more.  Let's live life so when we get to the end of our journey we are heavy with memories and not regret. Lets be remembered with love and because of the moments and memories we shared with others and not because of the long hours we worked, how productive we were or how well  we managed our  case loads.

Let's wander without the fear of getting lost. Lets live...just live! Anyone could perform your jobs but no one could live your life.